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Nonstop story.

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#91844

Re: Nonstop story.

Well, i dunno about an agenda since I'm not German, I just have very creative mind.

Anyway, the revolution proceeds withe rebels gaining control over all of America, Southern Canada and Northern Mexico. The European rebels fail, but they soon find that the Russians are a force waiting to strike the 1st Reich, and in the year 1675, they ride in on the Bear Cavarly destroying all in their path until they find Reichsritter Chuck Norris the Grand Lord of the Reich's army......
#91852

Re: Nonstop story.

watching simpson shows. Chuck Nrris doesn't notice the Russians in the room until they shut his TV off.  He then gets pissed and roundhouse kicks them back to Prussia(yes i realize the diff name) ;D
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
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#91960

Re: Nonstop story.

Who rules over his disiples with an iron fist and a lethal roundhouse kick  ;)
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92163

Re: Nonstop story.

so he moves to the north pole because he takes the saying "talking down to you" literally. when he gets there he meets santa claus and kicks him out leading to...
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Sommarkatze wrote:
OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD AND RAPE CEASERS GHOST IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN!?
#92172

Re: Nonstop story.

The 533rd World War with Chuck Norris leading the Reich's army against the Russians, the Italians and, Gandolf the Grey and Gandolf the White and "Monty Python Holy Grail" Black Knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, the Terminator, Cap'n Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Super Man, every single Power Ranger..........

Realizing that just like the 2 other times he was confronted with this threat, he will not be able to fight for the next 200 years, he decides to clone himself, thus creating the Chuck Armada, but all the Clones are different since they all had other mother hosts, thus leading to the birth of Bruce Lee, Jason Statham, Mr.T, and many other legendary fighters, with the inevitable clash occurring at Stalingrad resulting...........
#92191

Re: Nonstop story.

In no more Chuck Norris :o. This phenomial leads to
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92217

Re: Nonstop story.

the world having an imbalance of power and the poles are reversed. this leads to everyone going south instead of north, north instead of south. this leads to
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Sommarkatze wrote:
OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD AND RAPE CEASERS GHOST IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN!?
#92219

Re: Nonstop story.

a war started by the penguins at the Antarctic, they march through Argentina to conquer south america the now called "north" america :P... While the bears army is advancing through Canada in north america south america...
Mors Indecepta

Might controls everything, and without strength you cannot protect anything. Let alone yourself...
#92220

Re: Nonstop story.

The Polar bears try rushing the penguins since they are under the impression they are superior in all areas. However they do not realize that they are out numbered and with the help of the Penguins from the show the peguins of madagascar, the peguins now boast some impressive weaponry.

Utilizing the numerous atomic weapons left in the artic by the past US and their new weapons, the penguins quickly force the polar bears into retreat. This leads to
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92242

Re: Nonstop story.

The 534th World War during which the Polar Bears resurrect Chuck Norris and he leads them to victory, however when peace ensues, the Polar Bears want to create a Fascist Empire ruled by Polar Bears only thus starting a war with all other species of Animals, but Chuck decides to recreate Earth in his image and......
#92264

Re: Nonstop story.

Mother Earth suddenly grows a enormous beard :P
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92297

Re: Nonstop story.

Give Mother Earth a enormous cowboy hat ;D
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92311

Re: Nonstop story.

But then Rainbow dragon comes and kills mother nature and takes her place and since chuck can't kill rainbow dragon since he is in control of nature and if he did the world would die he leaves
war determines not who is right only who is left
#92324

Re: Nonstop story.

then I come and punch Rainbow Dragon in his face because he is OP. Due to the fact that I wear a ban ring on my fist, RBD quits the Nonstop story. Then I leave. Mother earth, liberated from the terror,...
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Lemberg - Baraque de Fraiture - Smolensk - Heiligenbeil - Nobel Dynamite Works - Lorient - Poltawa
#92327

Re: Nonstop story.

MaxiKing6 wrote:
then I come and punch Rainbow Dragon in his face because he is OP. Due to the fact that I wear a ban ring on my fist, RBD quits the Nonstop story. Then I leave. Mother earth, liberated from the terror,...


Give you a hug :P. But maxi is crushed to death since the world is like 1000000 times bigger and heavier than you. A funeral is held on mars when aliens suddenly attack and.....

OT: why u guys keep attacking RBD :P? Im new here so....help me out :P
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
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#92328

Re: Nonstop story.

Fishhunterx wrote:
MaxiKing6 wrote:
then I come and punch Rainbow Dragon in his face because he is OP. Due to the fact that I wear a ban ring on my fist, RBD quits the Nonstop story. Then I leave. Mother earth, liberated from the terror,...


Give you a hug :P. But maxi is crushed to death since the world is like 1000000 times bigger and heavier than you. A funeral is held on mars when aliens suddenly attack and.....


Seeme, their leader, expresses his condolences about my death. The attack was no attack, they only appeared in Empireal Star Destroyers because that's the only way for them to reach the Mars from Tattoine ;D
Suddenly, the peaceful atmosphere is interrupted by a deep rumble, caused by...

Fishhunterx wrote:
OT: why u guys keep attacking RBD :P? Im new here so....help me out :P


In this particular case (Nonstop story), his creativity is limited on making himself the main charakter and hero of the story and he continues to do so everytime he posts in here. ;)

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#92329

Re: Nonstop story.

Reminds me of the office.
If you get into an argument with me, you're wrong.
#92330

Re: Nonstop story.

GodlikeDennis wrote:
Reminds me of the office.


Never seen that show but I'll take your word for it :P

Back On topic:

The noise comes from the Imperial Star Destroyers who release a ton of garbage into space. Little do they realize the garbage exits the ship fast and within a week or so, itcrashes into Earth, killing many.The people of Earth take this as an attack on them directly and send X-Wing fighters to destroy the Star Destoyers, lead by George W. Bush since he's retired anyways ;D ;D
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92332

Re: Nonstop story.

Fishhunterx wrote:
The noise comes from the Imperial Star Destroyers who release a ton of garbage into space. Little do they realize the garbage exits the ship fast and within a week or so, itcrashes into Earth, killing many.The people of Earth take this as an attack on them directly and send X-Wing fighters to destroy the Star Destoyers, lead by George W. Bush since he's retired anyways ;D ;D


Wait - we have X-Wing fighters? Can I haz one? :D
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Lemberg - Baraque de Fraiture - Smolensk - Heiligenbeil - Nobel Dynamite Works - Lorient - Poltawa
#92347

Re: Nonstop story.

to take their tea
No mercy for cowards...
No mercy for enemies...
No mercy for Allies...
No mercy for the guys I see...
So stay away from me!
#92352

Re: Nonstop story.

And since their tea fuels their ships, they end up stuck in space


MaxiKing6 wrote:
Wait - we have X-Wing fighters? Can I haz one? :D


We're so lost when it comes to time in this story I don't see why we(Earth) can't have an AT-AT walker at this point ;D And if you want a X-Wing.....go to the toy store ;D ;D ;D
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"

Last edited October 1, 2011 at 3:09 PM by Fishhunterx

#92358

Re: Nonstop story.

Right, so the trapped British work for about a week creating a substitute Tea, which successfully allows them to power their fleet, bu the substitute tea is made out of their precious lazer munitions so they have to return to Earth to reload.

Meanwhile Darth Insidious (See what I did there :D ) prepares an attack on the British Home World, Planet Angland (having realized their Germanic roots they quickly become more German like), thus starting the FIRST INTERGALACTIC SPACE WAR....... 
#92363

Re: Nonstop story.

neosdark wrote:
Meanwhile Darth Insidious (See what I did there :D )


I did see what you did there  :P

Darth Sidious brings in the Death Star but when he tries to fire it, it says out of coffee, so he instead invades Earth, specifcally targeting Starbucks. As he takes Stabucks by Starbucks.......
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
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"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92403

Re: Nonstop story.

while the british take the rest of their civilisation on a giant space station called the ARK which they travel in for many years to find another home for them
war determines not who is right only who is left
#92428

Re: Nonstop story.

And eventually find the aliens still in their Star destroyers. Despite the fact their primary objective was to destroy them, they are too weak to do so and instead decide to live with them.
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92440

Re: Nonstop story.

What is up with you guys and Chuck Norris :P? Anyways,

But he is unable to get to Earth (or Planet Angland) since the Aliens refuse to give him a ship to use.
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#92535

Re: Nonstop story.

But considering his ships do not move too fast since they consisit of spare parts, the people of Angland have time to evacuate and leave a trap before the armada arrives
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
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"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#92540

Re: Nonstop story.

But Chucks superior tacticians know of their weakness and plan for the evacuation instead ambushing the Anglanders in deep space and capturing most if not all of their supply ships, thus leaving them with only a days supply of food and drink.
#92554

Re: Nonstop story.

but the people of Angland had a backup plan which half of the supply ships were hidden on the nearest planet and so they continued there voyage meanwhile...
war determines not who is right only who is left
#92560

Re: Nonstop story.

The aliens decide to help the Anglands so they steal the supplies back from Chuck's armada
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93275

Re: Nonstop story.

the Anglands find a new home and colonise the planet calling it New Angland
war determines not who is right only who is left
#93306

Re: Nonstop story.

And they live peacefully in New Angland for years to come.
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93309

Re: Nonstop story.

Meanwhile, back in the days of the Crusades, Pope Arnold the Holiest of the Holy (Even more so than Jesus), decides to fund experiments for the creation of (pre-Industrial Era) machine guns. Using his knowledge from the future he successfully creates a Gatling Gun, and later a  Hand Held Gatling Gun for mounting on his steed, the FIAT 1100 AD. With his near unstoppable army he decides to embark on quest to "Arnoldize" the entire Middle East.......
#93313

Re: Nonstop story.

neosdark wrote:
......back in the days of the Crusades.......decides to fund experiments for the creation of (pre-Industrial Era) machine guns. ......creates a Gatling Gun


Ummm I think the idea of gun powder must first be brought to Euro :P

neosdark wrote:
creates a Gatling Gun, and later a  Hand Held Gatling Gun for mounting on his steed, the FIAT 1100 AD


You mean this ;D?

Anyways, his horses(or camels) soon become tired of dragging around gatling guns. Saladin(general) sees this and attacks Pope Arnolds forces, suffering heavy casualties but forces Arnold force to retreat and Soloman captures some gatling guns for himself.
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"

Last edited October 8, 2011 at 4:15 PM by Fishhunterx

#93315

Re: Nonstop story.

Fishhunterx wrote:
neosdark wrote:
......back in the days of the Crusades.......decides to fund experiments for the creation of (pre-Industrial Era) machine guns. ......creates a Gatling Gun


Ummm I think the idea of gun powder must first me brought to Euro :P

neosdark wrote:
creates a Gatling Gun, and later a  Hand Held Gatling Gun for mounting on his steed, the FIAT 1100 AD


You mean this ;D?

Anyways, his horses(or camels) soon become tired of draggign around gatling guns. Soloman(general) sees this and attacks Pope Arnolds forces, suffering heavy casualties but forces Arnold force to retreat and Soloman captures some gatling guns for himself.


No man he designs a car for his army, thus they do not tire, since they run on pig manure (which they have plenty of) and are built of iron. They have special wooden wheels covered in designed just for desert travel...

The army retaliates seizing back the Captured Gatling Guns (and gunpowder has existed since approx. 9th century AD in China, from where it spread first to India and the Middle East and then to Europe). and destroying the Arabs standing in front of him, then........
#93317

Re: Nonstop story.

I dont think gunpowder was used as a firearm until 14 century by Euro forces. It was used as a fire arm in India IIRC but when China got it it was for fireworks or missle batteries(not very effective though ;))

@neosdark: How did he uhhh.....you know.....the pope and all...... get a.....CAR?!?!?! XD

Okay so Saladin realizes conventional military tactics will not work and decideds to ambush them. Pope Arnold moves toward Jerusalem when he is suddenly ambushed by Saladin and his Turk force. Arnold escapes with a few of his generals and men and Saladin gets ore gatling guns. He decideds its not enough to just capture them and starts copying them. His army, now armed fully armed with gatling guns........
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"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93325

Re: Nonstop story.

Is suddenly destroyed by a Meteor impacting and destroying his entire camp, killing almost all the men other than himself and his Guard. Arnold sees this as some kind of Divine Intervention and upon convincing Saladin of this, Saladin converts to Buddhism not wishing to ever serve Arnold AND SO.....
#93327

Re: Nonstop story.

Pope Arnold resumes his campaign for the Middle East
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93347

Re: Nonstop story.

But He falls on a rock and dies. Then...
The Russians think there sooo tough, wait till the Ostheer comes...

Coh Name: Seeme
#93352

Re: Nonstop story.

The crusaders and their camels are unsure what to do. So they go bacj home :P
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93370

Re: Nonstop story.

But then suddenly an armada of Chinese Dragons come from the sky attacking the Crusaders and killing half of them and destroying their Gatling Cars (THEY AREN'T CAMELS DAMN IT), so they decide to set up camp for the night and recover their Gatling guns when..........
#93387

Re: Nonstop story.

They are camels if you believe they are ^^

the chinese dragons launch their missle batteries at the crusaders. It doesn't kill anyone but it burns their camps down
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"
#93391

Re: Nonstop story.

So the crusaders make another one. Duh.
The Russians think there sooo tough, wait till the Ostheer comes...

Coh Name: Seeme
#93392

Re: Nonstop story.

So the Chinese bomb them again. Duh
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Om Nom Nom Nom
"Panzer-Guppy ready for battle!"
"Ha Ha Ha! We have the ZEAL!"
"Grenadiers! Fall In!!"